Self-evaluation is the deep end of the self-knowledge pool. Knowing who I am is considerably different than understanding why I am the way I am. Self-Evaluation is the only true way to look past the image that I have of myself and the explanations I have for my actions to the real me and motivations I’m carrying around. Most of us, however, suck at self-evaluation. Some become overly self-critical and beat themselves up. Others just apply new layers of dent-filler and fresh paint to their self-image and never critically examine what is really going on in their life and relationships and what part they play in making things the way they are. It is very important to find the practices of healthy self-evaluation and Elevate can help you with developing that into your life.
Through this section you will also be helped to find and use the anchor points of:
- Self Respect
Often self-respect is expressed as personal pride, but pride can be demeaning to others; coming off as arrogant and self-promoting. Respecting someone is about honoring them and treating them well. We do this for people we care about, so can we do this for ourselves? Do I respect myself enough to care about what I consume in food or chemicals? Do I respect myself enough to guard my soul from users and manipulators? Do I respect myself enough to resist the pressure to fit in with people who don’t care about themselves much less me? Self-respect is an important anchor point that you can use to elevate yourself out of dysfunctional relationships and self-destructive habits.
Every moment of every day we are hearing internal messages that are directly influencing our growth and success, either for good or bad. Most of us don’t pay attention. We let these unnoticed thoughts bounce through our minds without considering how they are affecting our climb. “I’m so stupid… this will never work… I should just give up… I can’t live without _________.” These are the kind of thoughts that flash through our minds so quickly that we often don’t even recognize they are there. But they are, and if they are negative that kind of self-talk will impact your mood, your focus, your energy and your beliefs more than you can imagine. Recognizing these thoughts and actively turning them into positive messages will improve your attitude and give you the hope and energy you need to move forward with your goals. This anchor point helps you to start noticing and changing the dialogue so that it aligns and supports who you want to be and where you want to go.
- Regulating Your Emotions
Emotions are a powerful and important part of what makes us humans, but emotions without a way to regulate and balance them, present a serious challenge for human beings. You can feel sad, stuck and hopeless, and can’t seem to shake it off no matter what you do. You can also feel happy and hopeful. Making life-decisions that are primarily based in feelings (positive or negative) is the way that a lot of people end up in a lot of troubles. This anchor point helps you to recognize what you are feeling, what is producing that feeling and to get honest about how your emotions are affecting your climb. Too many people shrug off the signs of negative emotions like anger or sadness and sink deeper into an emotional hole reaching the point where they can’t see any way of escape. That is a dangerous place to be. Others will take negative emotions and use them to react to other people around them with abusive language or actions. Some will turn to cutting or self-medicating to deal with feelings they have been unable to control. Recognizing your emotions early and then taking some positive steps to regulate how you deal with those emotions will help you get back on track with your climb and not get distracted from your goals.
- Positive & Grateful
One effective way to evaluate your emotional health is to check in on your gratitude. Getting past resentments and building a positive outlook on life is made possible through a regular and simple inventory of the things for which you are grateful. This anchor point helps in two ways: It secures you where you are to keep you from sliding backward, and it helps you pull forward and upward in your climb. Are you unhappy? Check your gratitude. Are you angry? Check your gratitude. This internal evaluation of what is good, working, healthy, a blessing or fortunate will help in fighting the pull of discouragement and negativity.
According to people who study the human brain, people who are fearful, negative and angry experience reduced ability to think and can find only a couple of options when facing problems. They often get stuck only thinking about the problem. But positive and contented thoughts trigger the ability to think of multiple possibilities and solutions. The other good news from brain researchers is positive and grateful thinking is a skill that can be developed and improved over time… you are not stuck with a negative mindset!